Raph's Ramblings

A Nexceptional Year for Sprouts!

2012-02-09T06:35:00.000-08:00

Allotments, Neckelchester Village

Greetings to all my dear human friends! It has been many Camelopardalian moons since I last visited your planet via the Interneck. We have had such adventures! I shall begin with our most important news; this has been a nexceptional year for sprouts ...

As you will know, we giraffes love our sprouts and they have a very special place in our culture and energy. (Necky Becky has just reminded me that she will NOT eat sprouts!)

Our Brassica camelopardalis are very similar to your earthly Brussels sprouts, coming from the same family. Here are some of our most popular varieties:

'Nexceptional' yields very neat tightly-budded sprouts with a lovely nutty flavour and is one of the easiest to grow.

'Celestial Giraffe' sprouts are a little untidy in their individual shapes, yet their taste is truly heavenly! Those of us with a delicate and experienced palate can detect subtle honey-like flavours that vary from region to region.

Last and most important is our great 'Fountain of Flatulence', grown especially for our AFF Gas energy supply. A robust plant that will flourish in any soil, it has a wholesome flavour especially popular in soups.

Camelopardalian sprouts grow very tall, and have to be harvested with special long-handled tools.

Here we are enjoying a family sprout-gathering in our vegetable patch at Necky Knoll House. The February evening sun sends low shafts of light between the trees and overhead the sky is dusky pink and mauve.

As it grows dark an enticing aroma wafts across the garden. Uncle Girth is busy at a huge tureen of freshly prepared sprout soup! It's time for supper ...

Reminiscing & new beginnings as we stick our necks out for our dreams!

2011-05-19T16:00:00.000-07:00

This time of year is a rather nostalgic time for me. We have been celebrating the anniversary of when we moved to our lovely new home, Necky Knoll House, and set up our Giraffe World Tours family business. And with every anniversary, there is a time of looking back as well as looking forward.

I remember standing outside our old home, Neckmoor Cottage, and bidding the rugged scenery farewell. A group of wild giraffes stood silhouetted in the twilight.

As we packed all our belongings ready to move, Maureen and I looked at each other, and I knew we were thinking the same thoughts.

It was on the journey to our new home that Maureen first sang our Beginning song, looking out of the windows of the bus. Now we sing it every year in the Spring.

So here we are, in the warm friendly squabbly family glow of everydayness. As we sing, we remember ... and we also look forward, sticking our necks out for our dreams!

'It's the beginning
Of something new,
Something to wait for
Dreams coming true.
Life for living
Places to see,
Being the things that
We want to be.

Though we go
By road unknown,
We move on
Together.
Though we seek
Freedom of mind,
Strength we find
In harmony.'

An Anniversary Celebration: Farewell to Accounting - Enter Giraffe Entrepreneur!

2011-04-06T17:23:00.000-07:00

We are all amazed that another whole year has passed and our anniversary celebrations are with us again for that wonderful day in April 2008, when I said farewell to accounting! Who would have predicted the nextent to which our lives were to change?

The photo above was taken as I received my lovely leaving gifts at Storey & Tawle, the Raffsburgh accountancy firm I had worked with for so long. (This link will take you to the original post). Oh the joys I have had looking through the lovely telescope - most especially gazing all those light years away to Planet Earth, and knowing that all my dear human bloggy-friends are there!

My first ever blog post was The Escape of a Giraffe Accountant, when I handed in my notice, and since then we haven't looked back! Our new family business Giraffe World Tours was born, we bought our bus, we moved house, we've had nexciting adventures, made lots of mistakes, had lots of fun, grown closer as a family. And we're always moving on to the neckst step of the way! Even when we don't know what it is ...

If I have one nexhortation for you, dear human bloggy-friends, it is this: Stick your necks out for your dreams!

And now it's time to party!

A Forest Walk in Spring

2011-02-13T17:06:00.000-08:00

Early this morning we looked nexcitedly out of the windows of Necky Knoll House to see if the sun was shining. Yes! It was perfect weather for our planned day out in the Forest, with a beautiful dawn light playing on the sides of the Knolls.

The morning mist still clung to the valleys, and as we drew near to the Forest it seemed to beckon mysteriously.

Littl' Nicky toddled on ahead. "Ooh, Daddy!" he nexclaimed, "Flowers!"

Further into the Forest, we caught a glimpse of some flying girigglies, who performed a Spring dance while Nexi and Necky Becky watched, spellbound.

There were woodland creatures everywhere! A long wrigglie paused for me to take his photo as he scuttled nexuberantly among the leaves and mosses.

We saw beautiful little mounds of giraffe moss on some old stone walling, back lit by the sun to look like miniature citadels.

Everywhere we noticed signs of the coming Spring - each twig studded with buds bursting into life!

In the shadows of the trees grew the lovely little Giranthus flowers, shining like miniature lanterns.

And the sweet Viola giraffata greeted us shyly with bowed heads.

As our children ran ahead of us along the path, Maureen and I recalled happy memories of days spent in this beautiful place, and looked forward to many more.

Double the Neck in 2011!

2011-01-01T15:28:00.001-08:00

Greetings from Camelopardalis Constellation and Happy New Year to all our dear friends on planet Earth!

With two giraffe-necks in it, 2011 promises to be a nexuberant year. Stick your necks out for your dreams, and love your planet!

We are back at Necky Knoll House after a wonderful holiday at the tree house, and have been celebrating by singing our family song, 'With Our Necks Entwined'. No doubt you will be able to identify all our voices - do join in with us, and if you can find a secret portal to our world, you are most welcome at our party!

Happy Holidays to all our Friends!

2010-12-24T09:11:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays to all our dear human bloggy-friends from the Neckmann family in Giraffe World, Camelopardalis Constellation!

The family were so eager to see the lovely little tree-house where I took refuge when lost in the snow, that we decided to spend our Midwinter Holiday here!

We took neckloads of festive food, with enough to share with any of the tree-giraffes who may be around. It's quite full in the little house with all our duvets on the floor, but it's gloriously snug and fun.

Have a lovely holiday, and stick your necks out for your dreams!

Which way neckst?

2010-12-16T15:34:00.000-08:00

For days and days I stayed in the warm little tree-house refuge, watching for a lessening of the snow, and reading. Oh the cosiness and comfort of roasted nut casseroles and winter fruit loaf, but how I missed my family! I hoped they were reading this blog, so they wouldn't be too worried about me.

One magenta-hued afternoon the snow seemed to have stopped, and I stood outside on a branch and surveyed the landscape below. It was time to set off to find my way home ...

I walked long across snow-covered hills and valleys, craning my neck to see what lay ahead. All was well until I reached a frozen river that opened out to a large lake. All ice-covered and daunting to a giraffe with a tendency to clumsiness! But where else could I go?

Tentatively I stepped forward on to the ice. As I slithered and swayed, I caught sight of what looked like a strange sea monster in the distance. Crash! Distracted, I landed flat on the ice, and quickly crawled my way back to the shore.

A terrific sound of cracking ice followed, and I was startled to see the ice moving up rather than down! As I gazed in consternation, imagine my surprise when heard a merry voice raised in song: 'Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle!' From beneath the ice rose the familiar and oh-so-welcome shape of Necktune's Chariot, with Captain Gurgle grinning at the helm! Behind him the dear faces of my family beamed and I heard Necky Becky shrieking 'Dad, Dad!' Maureen stood in the doorway and held out her hand.

What celebration on the way home! The non-stop party we've had since arriving back at Necky Knoll House!

Thank you dear tree giraffes for your cosy refuge. And thank you to Blogger, for it was from seeing my posts and photos that Captain Gurgle was able to work out my whereabouts!

Lost - and safe - in a Tree!

2010-12-02T18:29:00.001-08:00

What a night I had! Yesterday I was lost in the snow, wandering round and round in the mountains with no idea where I was going. It was such a comfort, having my Intergalactic mobile phone, and being able to communicate with my human bloggy and twitter friends! But I had no means of contacting my fellow giraffes to find my whereabouts.

I suddenly had the idea of climbing a tree. As a magnificent sunset shone all around me, I surveyed the landscape.

Nothing recognisable. Tired and weary, I was turning to climb down, when I saw a small green doorway. Beyond the open doors was a lovely little room, with food, a warm cosy bed, and even some books. Oh bliss, oh safety! I had found one of the resting-houses created by our rambling tree-giraffes!

'Thank you', I sighed. I climbed gratefully into bed, and drifted off to sleep.

The Snow is getting deeper!

2010-12-01T08:29:00.000-08:00

We've been drinking so much hot chocolate that we've already gone through the supply I brought the other day! I'm walking to the village again to get some more.

It's such a beautiful sunny winter's day ...

The snow seems to be getting deeper. I can't quite see where I'm heading - hope I'm going the right way!

UPDATE!

A big THANK YOU to Solitary Walker, for his comment warning me I was heading for a ravine!

Now I've got to work out where I am and how to get to Neckelchester village and back home to Necky Knoll House!

A Lovely Snowy Evening Walk!

2010-11-28T14:47:00.000-08:00

After our nexuberant Sledging Party last night we had run out of hot chocolate, so I volunteered to walk in to Neckelchester village to buy some more. It was early evening, and I decided to go through the woods instead of by the road, and what an enchanting walk it was!

Everywhere was so still and peaceful. There is a tranquillity about woodland in the snow that cannot be found anywhere else.

Coming back, the stars shine in the magenta sky. I have hot chocolate in my bag, and I am happy.

More from our underwater nexpedition!

2010-11-21T08:06:00.000-08:00

Hello again, dear Bloggy-friends! We've all been nexceptionally busy catching up on everything back here at Necky Knoll House. Our main sprout-harvesting season has begun, and we're also in the middle of our November Dream Digging time.

However, I've managed to go through some of our photos and films from our underwater nexpedition, and thought I'd start by posting our recording of Captain Gurgle singing his famous Tea Shanty! Necky Becky had a great time with some of the prompting and chorus.

If you'd like to join in with the song, the lyrics feature in an earlier post, which also introduces Captain Gurgle. There are also more of our songs on our Nex Factor YouTube Channel.

Back from under the Ocean!

2010-10-15T06:36:00.000-07:00

Hello again, dear human bloggy friends! I hope all is well with you on planet Earth!

What a very long time since blogging ... and what adventures we giraffes have had! We've been on a fantastic nexcursion with Captain Gurgle in our new submarine, Necktunes' Chariot. I wanted to keep you all posted during our underwater journeys, but couldn't get the Interneck. Then I dropped my neckbook computer into the sea, and have had to wait till our return to buy a new one in Raffsburgh.

There is so much to tell you ... Captain Gurgle sailed Necktune's Chariot down and down into the depths of our Camelopardalian seas. We sailed past ancient giraffe citadels which have been submerged for centuries.

As the submarine went deeper and deeper, we caught glimpses through the portholes of floating seaweed, and shy giraffe sea-creatures.

And what wondrous life there was on the seabed! All these nexquisite little persons chatting together among the rocks.

We managed to film this friendly Fringey, who waved at us and sang it's little sea song! I hope you enjoy it, and look forward to visiting you all over the next few days.

The Interneck is running slow!

2010-01-12T18:00:00.001-08:00

I don't know about you friends on planet Earth, but our Interneck has been running really slow ... I have considered sending my comments to you by snail mail, as it may be quicker!

There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with our phone connecktion ...

So I looked through my telescope to see if I could spot anything amiss in the space between our worlds. All looked peaceful and harmonious.

Maureen suggested I speak to our computer nexpert, Nekky Tekky. Rather surprisingly he told me to bring the bus, the family, warm clothes and skis!

I followed his instructions, and we all set off on a journey to our polar regions. As on planet Earth, many of our server farms are situated there to keep the servers cool. Nekky Tekky suspected this may be where the problem lay.

The family wandered around enjoying the ethereal scenery, while Nekky Tekky muttered around in the server farm.

We were summoned by his triumphant squeal, "Pengrins!"

Our problem, dear bloggy friends, has been caused by colonies of pengrins warming their bottoms on the heat rising from our underground servers and blocking the intergalactic cyber-waves!

We didn't have the heart to move them, so I'll just have to put up with slower blogging ... I guess it'll give me time to eat more chocolate biscuits while the comments load up!

Giraffe Greetings of the Season!

2009-12-24T09:21:00.001-08:00

Giraffe Greetings of the Season!

To all my dear bloggy friends, may you have a nextra special holiday! Thank you so much for your treasured friendship throughout the year and your wonderful blogs.

Much love from Raph, Maureen and all of us at Necky Knoll House!

Where's the best place for our fabulous photo?

2009-12-02T14:24:00.000-08:00

Some time ago, at the Secret Portal behind the Intergalactic Cacti, a beautiful shell photograph arrived for me from Country Girl!
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The whole family fell in love with its subtle colours and entrancing spiral shape receding softly into the background.
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After having it framed, we have nexperimented with hanging it in various rooms. As usual, the family all want to hang it in different places ... I'm calling on you, dear bloggy friends, to help us in the nexciting task of deciding!

I rather like it by the fireplace, near Derrick's Melrose photos, so I can gaze at it in comfort from my rocking chair ...

Uncle Girth thinks it should be in the hall by the front door, so it's the first thing people see on entering Necky Knoll House.

Our toddler son, Littl' Nicky says that as his neck is not yet as long as ours, he cannot see it when it's too high - so how about just above the work surface in the kitchen?

Both Nexi and Nektareeni think that a shell is a good subject to have in the bathroom. But Maureen pointed out that it may get spoiled by all the steam and condensation.

She suggested hanging it just outside the bathroom on the landing. We tried it there just as Necky Becky was climbing the ladder up to her attic bedroom.

"Ooh!" she yelled, "I want it! In my secret attic room!"

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Sounds familiar! But it wouldn't benefit the rest of us, as she doesn't allow anyone in her room ...
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Over to you! Where would you hang the lovely shell photo if you lived in our house?
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And of course, a big giraffy Thank You to Country Girl for our wonderful present! Do visit her blog, Chronicles of a Country Girl, and see all her beautiful photographs.

A Tree of Gold

2009-11-15T17:26:00.001-08:00

A few days ago I dreamed about a tree of gold.

Dee of 'A Desert Observer' had asked if anyone knew the identity of a lovely tree in her neighbour's garden, and I must have been thinking about the yellow leaves as I went to sleep that night. When I awoke I had the above image very vividly in my mind.

Feeling that there could be some neckouragement in this for my bloggy-friends, I thought I would share it. Maybe it will have different meanings for each of you.

November Dream-digging

2009-11-09T14:39:00.001-08:00

November is very special in Giraffe World. It is dream-digging time!

As you know, dear bloggy-friends, our gleeful motto is 'Stick your neck out for your dreams!' During the year, our dreams often become a little clouded. We use this time of new beginning to review and re-energize our aspirations.

First of all, we take special leaves from the garden, and write onto them our cherished dreams for the year to come.

Then as a whole family, we busily dig over our vegetable plots ready for winter. Even youngest child Littl' Nicky loves to help, and is very nexcited about our dream-digging!

As the moon rises, we all go out to the Forest to collect fallen leaves from among the pale dappled tree-trunks.

The drive at Necky Knoll House is soon piled high with beautiful leaves.

They are dug deep into our vegetable and flower gardens. For us, this is both a solemn and gleeful occasion, during which we review the past year, and look ahead to the year to come.

At the first signs of dawn, we take our special 'dream-leaves' and dig them deep into the tilled earth. Along with all the other leaves, they will be transformed over winter, and take part in the magical rebirth of spring. Through all the seasons, whenever we look at our lovely garden, we will be reminded to stick our necks out for our dreams!

What helps you to follow your dreams, dear human bloggy-friends?

Happy Birthday Weaver of Grass, and Happy Hallowe'en Everyone!

2009-10-30T18:28:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to our dear bloggy-friend the Weaver of Grass!

(Did you know, Weaver, that you were the first human to comment on my blog!)

Here Maureen and I and Littl' Nicky are strolling down one of our favourite lanes past the tall barn at the edge of the Wood. There's a lovely Autumn feel in the air, and the breeze is swishing through the trees. The Wood beckons and we lift our necks in glee knowing we have a lovely walk ahead of us.

And Happy Hallowe'en to everyone!

Here's a special 'spooky' picture, taken in our Forest. (Necky Becky wanted to be on this one!) Our trees like to dance before the moon, and we'll soon be having our Hallowe'en party! (We haven't a clue what Hallowe'en is about, but all you dear bloggy friends seem to enjoy it, so we thought we'd stick our necks out and celebrate it too!).

Our Nextra Day Nexcursion from September 31st

2009-10-14T13:23:00.000-07:00

Hooray, dear bloggy friends - I have time to blog again! We've been having a nextremely busy autumn, and I've missed you all. I've been longing to tell you about our special nexcursion!
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Here in Giraffe World we have what are known as Nextra Days. These are special days which some other planets do not have, and one of them is September 31st. We giraffes do so love to visit Planet Earth, and the best time to do so en masse is when we cannot be seen by humans! So it was with great nexcitement that we all piled into the Tours Bus at dawn for our journey through the Secret Portal behind the Intergalactic Cacti. ...

We'd decided to visit a city in the UK called Durham. What a charming historical location! We had the Market Place all to ourselves, and our presence energized a giraphic transformation of some of the features.

Later, we wandered down to the River below the spectacular Cathedral. Some of our party enjoyed rowing giraffe-style while the rest of us watched from the banks.

At the end of a lovely day we squeezed back through the secret portal, singing and laughing all the way home.

Ah - but not all of us! With typical rebellious neck, our middle child, Necky Becky decided she'd like to spend another day in Durham, without thinking that the 1st of October was not a Nextra Day, and the place would be full of humans! She sneaked off the bus as it slowed down by the Cacti and made her way back through the portal.

As soon as we got home Maureen and I noticed her absence. I spent a long night travelling back to Planet Earth, and searched everywhere for Necky Becky, taking care not to be seen by humans. At last I spotted her - she had got into the Town Hall, and was standing defiantly in the window behind some famous Durham County cricketers who were being photographed. (She does like to be in the limelight!)

I managed to take this photo of her, and persuaded her to come back to the bus immediately by promising her she could learn to play cricket. Ah, the trials of giraffe parent-hood ...

An intergalactic surprise from Bindu!

2009-09-19T07:12:00.001-07:00

It was with great nexcitement that I went looking for our Tours bus the other day ... I had heard from the keeper of the Secret Intergalactic Cacti that there was a package from Bindu awaiting me at the Portal!

After locating the bus in our vegetable patch, (I'd forgotten I was supposed to load it up with sprouts for the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant), I set off along the mountain road. The Secret Intergalactic Cacti are hidden deep in the gardens of the Cave of Beginning in the mountains. The journey is via a beautiful scenic route, steeped in our history - and the Cave itself - breathtaking! I will give you a guided tour one day.

As I approached, I could see an envelope hidden among the huge cacti, right next to the entrance to the Secret Portal ...

The ancient giraffe carving on the boulder above looked to be guarding the envelope, and I bowed my neck in thanks as I carefully picked up my gift. I almost ran back to the bus, and eagerly opened the envelope.

Oh how lovely! Three beautiful bookmarks created by Bindu herself in these gorgeous glowing colours! I particularly love the one with the sunflower-like patterns, I could gaze at it for hours. Thank you so much Bindu - I shall treasure them! They will go in my Journal, my current new read and my favourite book The Wind in the Willows, which I read on a continuous loop, so I will enjoy looking at them every day.

Dear bloggy friends, do visit Bindu's lovely blog, Transient Lives. It is one of my favourites, with beautiful photographs of Bindu's travels and a fascinating range of topics.

The Giraffaway Winners!

2009-09-14T06:22:00.001-07:00

Littl' Nicky was full of anticipation as we made our way to the kitchen at noon yesterday for the Giraffaway draw!

Our eldest daughter Nexi had neatly written all the entrants' names on pieces of paper and dropped them into our favourite teapot. Littl' Nicky was bouncing around with nexcitement as Maureen placed the teapot on a little stool so he could reach into it to draw the first winning name.

Closing his eyes he picked a piece of paper out of the teapot. "Oooooh - Nummy One!" he squealed.

"Here!" called Nexi, "I'll read it out - Number One - BT The Crafty Gardener!"

There was a round of applause, and Maureen and I did a little dance.

Maureen gave the teapot a vigorous shake, and Littl' Nicky reached into the pot. "Nummy Two!"

There was a loud shriek from Nexi as something wet and soggy landed in her hand. It was a teabag!

"Oh, Necky Becky, you were supposed to empty and dry the teapot!" chided Maureen.

Necky Becky glared and looked sulky.

Littl' Nicky put his hand into the pot again, and this time pulled out another slip of paper. "This is Nummy Two and I can read it, Mummy," he called delightedly, "It says 'Janet'!"

We all cheered again.

"This next one is the last one!" called Maureen.

"Nummy Three" said Littl' Nicky, pulling another slip out of the teapot.

Nexi peeled open the soggy paper.

"Dad, there are two slips here - stuck together with the wet!"

"A nextra prize, a nextra prize!" chanted Littl' Nicky joyfully.

Maureen looked at the pieces of paper. "This is thanks to Necky Becky not emptying the tea - we have four lucky winners instead of three!"

Necky Becky's sulky face lit up with a big smile.

"Number Three, Barbara Martin!" she yelled, "And Number Four, Heather!"

So here we are - congratulations to the four lucky winners of our first Giraffaway! I will be contacting you to organize the intergalactic dispatch of the giraffe cards you have chosen.

Thank you to all dear bloggy friends who entered, it's been great fun and I'm sure this will be the first of many Giraffaways at Necky Knoll House!

Giveaways for me - Giveaways for you!

2009-09-08T15:49:00.001-07:00

I'm really nexcited! I've won two giveaways: beautiful bookmarks by Bindu and a lovely shell photograph by Country Girl, and eagerly await their appearance at the Secret Portal behind the Cacti! I will feature them on my blog when they arrive.

And another cause for nexcitement at Necky Knoll House is that Maureen and I have launched an Interneck shop for our giraffe cards, which we have called Giraffe Greetings!

Our IT nexpert, Nekky Tekky, has set up a special intergalactic portal, which means we are not limited to serving giraffes in our Camelopardalis constellation, but can nextend our services to planet Earth.

Inspired by the giveaways of my fellow bloggers, we thought it would be fun to celebrate in bloggyland with a special greeting card giraffaway - a gift of four giraffe cards each to three bloggy friends!

If you'd like the chance to win four of our giraffy cards, here's how: decide which four cards from our Giraffe Greetings shop you like best, and leave me a comment with their titles. On Sunday at noon GWT, (Giraffe World Time), I will put your names on folded bits of paper into my favourite teapot, and let Littl' Nicky pick out three.

The three winners will be published on the blog, so you can then let me know where to send your cards!

Whoopee - I think this is a reason for another party!

A party to remember - and still rockin'!

2009-09-03T15:32:00.001-07:00

Thank you, all my dear human bloggy friends, for your lovely birthday wishes! We've had a party long even by giraffe standards ... The culmination was a necktacular performance by the Stiffnex band at dawn on Tuesday. Have you ever seen about a hundred giraffes doing air guitar? We danced, we sang, we celebrated until the morning mists lifted.

Now I'm resting, but still rocking!

Allow me to show you my wonderful birthday present from Maureen and the kids - a beautiful new rocking chair! It's just the right height for my neck, and makes a lovely creaking noise.

Our eldest daughter Nexi made the cushion, with giraffes and ice-creams stamped all over it with rainbow coloured fabric dyes.

She also stamped a special design on the headrest, featuring me with our youngest child Littl' Nicky. I am depicted sitting on my old rocking chair, (the one I left outside in the rain too often!!).

Ah, dear bloggy friends, wouldn't it be marvellous if my new rocker was a magic chair which could fly up to a secret portal between our Giraffe World and your planet Earth, and ferry you through the clouds to Necky Knoll House to help us eat the rest of the cakes!

It's my birthday!

2009-08-25T04:10:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday! I feel quite bashful about posting this, but Necky Becky is insisting ...

I had a nice cup of tea in bed this morning, (literally, because Hals jumped up and knocked it over), and lots of giraffe cards and presents and gleefulness. We're all having the day off, and tonight ... a big party at Necky Knoll House!

Dear bloggy friends, I hope that you will all indulge in a large piece of cake with us across the intergalactic miles. I wish I could transport you all through a secret portal so you could join in the party celebrations!

Time to go - I'm being summoned by Girth about the menu!

Spotlight on Nukkle the Drummer!

2009-08-19T15:31:00.000-07:00

On my previous post, (oh, my neck - was it really so long ago?!), many of you commented how you loved Nukkle. I thought I'd treat you to a special post about him! (He's all embarrassed and gruff about it, muttering "Mmmvhhhhhhhhh!", but is really rather pleased ...)

So ... Nukkle is the drummer with the Stiffnex band. He isn't terribly tall, but he is big: big hands, big feet, wide neck, and a big heart!

By day he works as apprentice plumber and fitter at the AFF Gas plant, (Anatomically Friendly Flatulence), which powers Neckelchester village. He loves his job! (The picture above shows him with the gas plant's own special band, the AFF Gas Trumpeters).

Nukkle wears his work dungarees wherever he goes, even on stage with the Stiffnex, and keeps his tools in the pockets with his drumsticks.

This means he often gets his drumsticks and spanners mixed up, which doesn't do the drumkit much good at all ...

(You can see a video of him performing with the Stiffnex by clicking here to go to an earlier post).

Nukkle is altogether rather clumsy, and gets terribly teased by his friends. For instance, when carrying his kit down into our cellar, he slipped on some soup which Girth had slopped on the floor.

Down he went, to rise covered in Parsneck Soup!

The drums went bouncing down into the cellar, and are now rather mis-shapen!

Both Nukkle and Necky Becky are good at looking grumpy.

However, Nukkle sweats out any grumpiness when he's playing his beloved drums.

The other great love in his life is his food. Nukkle's idea of bliss is to sit on his favourite bench in the village park and eat his lunch - usually a monster sandwich called the 'Giroffimo'. This is a huge triple-decker made with both white and brown bread. Filled with toasted peppers, onions, garlic, stir-fried bananas, and three different kinds of cheese, it oozes spicy relish and mayonnaise...

"Mmmmmmmmmvhhhhhhhh!"

One day, I'll tell you the story, 'Nukkle's Sandwich' !

Inspiration Wednesday!

2009-07-28T15:10:00.000-07:00

Inspiration Wednesday is the inspired idea of The Weaver of Grass! Do click on her name to visit her blog, see her own post and the list of other participants ...

The idea is to blog about who or what has inspired us. Of course, I have to start with Maureen! My serene and beautiful wife, pictured above, who has been my biggest inspiration and encouragement all our years together. I've been moved to create a new header especially in celebration!

And our children! Pictured here house-hunting before finding Necky Knoll House, you can see that even though we do not always seem to be looking in the same direction, we are all sticking our necks out together!

My former work-colleagues at Storey and Tawle Accountants also gave me great encouragement in my decision to leave to follow my dream of setting up Giraffe World Tours. (They've been regular customers ever since - so it wasn't that they were glad to see the back of me!) Their gift of my lovely new telescope reminds me of them every time I use it to look across at planet Earth from our Camelopardalis constellation!

I can list so many who have stuck their necks out to follow their dreams: My glamorous sister Nektareeni, initially a lawyer, who set up her own boutique and jointly owns the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant with her partner Girth, pictured below.

Our dear friend Trachelus Aplombus, engineer with AFF Gas and local historian.

His apprentice, Nukkle, who plays drums with The Stiffnex band in his spare time - often getting his spanners and drumsticks mixed up!

And of course all my dear human bloggy friends, without whom there would be no motivation to blog across the intergalactic space! Thank you all so much for your inspiring blogs and your encouraging comments.

I hope you will join in with us in our song, 'With Our Necks Entwined' which tells of our decision to move house and set up our family business. It has an easy to sing chorus, sung by Maureen and Nexi, and maybe you will be able to identify the rest of our family's voices in the verses!
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Stick your necks out for your dreams!

Summer in Giraffe World!

2009-07-09T12:13:00.001-07:00

It's summer time in Giraffe World, and I've hardly any time for blogging!
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No doubt you are looking at the holiday snap above and thinking I've been whiling away the time drinking lemonade in exotic resorts! Not so this year - that was all before we ran our own tours company! (You may recognize part of the photo as being my 'profile' pic on blogger! It is my favourite holiday snap ...)

This summer I've been driving our Giraffe World Tours bus full of tourists! Quite tiring , but great fun too. On the photo above you can see the bus parked down in the valley. We were taking a party of Neckelchester residents on a day trip into the Mountains - Necky Becky, of course, went off on her own with Hals and got lost!

However, the biggest drain on my blogging time is the lawn-mowing ... (Do I hear groans of agreement echoing through the Intergalactic blogosphere?) Necky Knoll House has vast lawns, most of which are at vertiginous angles, making mowing a nextreme balancing act!

It's no use asking for help from one's offspring ...

But I am not entirely without assistance ... in the quiet summer evenings we hear much chewing ... Three cheers for the Knollshire snails!

I wish you all a nexcellent summer, dear bloggy friends.

Mug Monday!

2009-06-21T19:25:00.001-07:00

The Weaver of Grass and Acornmoon are hosting 'Mug Monday', and I thought I would join in. There's nothing I like better than a nice mug of hot tea while I read the Neckelchester News!

As you can see, our mugs in Giraffe World are ergonomically designed to suit our long necks - just like the head-rests in the motoring magazine the giraffe above is reading.

Our surface designs range from classic giraffe-markings, usually in orange, or blue ...

... to the more elaborate, as in Captain Gurgle's mug, above.

Camelopardalian mugs go back in our history. In the picture above, two lady giraffes are daintily sipping from elegant mugs.

We also have some quaint customs dating from ancient times. The above snapshot shows a giraffe practising the old habit of throwing the dregs of one's tea over a companion - believed to condition our fur and add to it's lustre.

Weaver of Grass mentioned that we could include a 'Country Living' style picture in our mug post - so here's one of the dresser in our kitchen at Necky Knoll House!

I hope you have enjoyed our Giraffe World mugs - I'm looking forward to seeing the other participants' mugs later today!

Waitering at the Gleeful & Greedy!

2009-06-10T16:16:00.001-07:00

My apologies, dear bloggy friends, for recently keeping you waiting with blog posts and comments: while you've been waiting - I've been waitering!

On top of my already busy schedule running Giraffe World Tours, I've been helping out at the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant at their busiest times.

As many of you know, the very popular Gleeful and Greedy is situated in Neckelchester Village, and is owned by my sister Nektareeni and her partner Girth.

Talented and good-natured Girth does everything to do with the cooking, including inventing all the delectable recipes.

Glamorous Nektareeni is the expert on wine.

I'm hopeless at both, and a little clumsy too. However, I seem to amuse the customers... (Oh dear - I've just thought - maybe they think I am a comedy act rather than a waiter!)

The real act of the evening is when Nektareeni gets up and sings.

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Her favourite song is 'They call me Nektareeni.' Do click on the title to be transported to an evening at the Gleeful & Greedy!

The Giraffe Method of Stress Release ...

2009-06-01T19:05:00.001-07:00

There are pressured times on Planet Earth, and I know that many of my human friends are feeling stressed.

I thought therefore that I would tell you about our gentle giraffe method of stress release ...

We giraffes love to eat fruit, and one of our favourites is raspberries. There is an area of land behind the shops along Neckelchester Front Street used for fruit and vegetable cultivation. Here you will find our lovely all-year-round raspberry patches.

Imagine a warm June evening. As the sun sets, the full moon rises in a pink sky, haloing the edges of the raspberry stems and leaves with light. The atmosphere is tranquil as the residents of the village move quietly among the plants.

Come and join us, dear bloggy friends. Don't let your stress build up ...

Join us in our peaceful method of stress release ... blow a gentle giraffe raspberry!

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AWARD! A warm thank you to Mad Aunt Bernard for giving me the Zombie Chicken Award for silliness. I take my silliness very seriously, and really appreciate this. Do visit her splendid blog, where you can see the award, (I can't seem to load awards up on my computer), and read her tortoise poetry and other wonderful posts. (You know, I think she is rather neccentric too!)

Bench of the Week!

2009-05-22T05:49:00.001-07:00

I thought I would stick my neck out today and join in with 'Bench of the Week'!
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This has been started by RuneE of Visual Norway, (a stunning photo-blog - wish there was a secret portal for me to visit Norway from Camelopardalis!). 'Bench of the Week' is not a meme as such, but RuneE welcomes anyone to join in by posting a picture of a bench on Fridays.
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Here in Giraffe World we have many benches, as we all love to sit and read, or talk, or fall asleep in the sun ...
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The only bench picture I could find for today has me on it too - I'm sure you won't mind! (It was taken a while ago when I was a little slimmer and didn't need to wear my glasses ...) The seat has a lovely view across the River, and is nicely ornate with the giraffe arm-rests. However, personally I prefer a higher back for neck support while reading my Raffsburgh Review!

Necktune's Chariot!

2009-05-09T18:10:00.000-07:00

This has been a thrilling week for our Giraffe World Tours business! We have dramatically increased the scope of our outings ... Not only do we still have our lovely blue bus, we have just acquired a new vehicle for underwater nexpeditions - Necktune's Chariot!

The above drawing by Nexi shows us setting off on our inaugural ride. The sub has long retractable legs, which are so useful for setting off on the beach and getting into the shallow water. Once in the deep ocean we can submerge and look at the above-sea views through our long giraffe-neck periscopes. The round port-hole windows allow us to observe the sea-life.

Fortunately I am not expected to sail Necktune's Chariot! We have a new member of staff at Giraffe World Tours - Captain Gurgle. I took this photo of him through my telescope, (he is a little camera-shy).

However, when it comes to singing shanties, all bashfulness departs! Get him in the Gleeful & Greedy on an evening, and he'll entertain the whole village ... Here are the lyrics of his favourite song about his favourite brew - tea.

(My dear bloggy friend and poet, Poetikat, recently asked if there were many poets in Giraffe World. I know Captain Gurgle wouldn't consider his shanties to be poetry - but they're certainly fun to sing!)

Who'd like to join us on our underwater adventures?

Springtime in Knollshire

2009-04-27T17:10:00.001-07:00

Dear Bloggy Friends, you are highly favoured! Necky Becky, our oft-times grumpy daughter is in a good mood, and has decided, (nay - demanded!), that I should share with you one of our favourite spring walks.

I'll let her speak:

"This is our best view of Knollshire up here. You can even see our Necky Knoll House with the garden round it. There's my Dad's vegetable garden too. (He doesn't do much work in it though). Me 'n' Hals are on our favourite knoll. Old Gnarly the gardener says there's supposed to be a secret portal to another world called planet Earth, somewhere round here!"

Necky Becky never minds the rain. We had a few late April showers today, but she still insisted we go on our walk with Hals, posting a letter for Maureen en route.

I love the overcast skies of showery spring days. Each droplet of rain seems luminous and full of promise. The grass gleams in the vernal light.

We all love to wander through The Forest. How beautiful it is there, with the birches clad in spring green. The young leaves shimmer as pinky giraffe-patterned clouds move mysteriously across the sky.

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Everything pulsates with a sense of waiting. The feeling of growing, ('growyness' as Necky B. calls it), pervades the atmosphere.

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Not to be missed out, big sister Nexi asked me to include this little 'decoupage' she has created from Necky Becky's picture.

(Girth's just hollered across the room that we've not included a view of he and Nektareeni's Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant! There's a special story to tell you about that next time ...)

Happy Spring!

Les Choses Ordinaires de Raph

2009-04-13T18:20:00.001-07:00

Back in the mists of time, (on Tuesday the 10th of March!) Chris Hale , the wonderful wordsmith of Middenshire, tagged me. I am here at long last doing his bidding: listing six things or habits of no real importance about myself ...

Six Choses Ordinaires de Raph

1 It is so quiet here where we live, that at night I can hear the snails chewing.

2 I love eating bananas.

3 I frequently get wonderful new business ideas ...

4 My hot water bottles all have names. (Do you give yours names too?) This one is called Toastie.

5 I have an alter-ego! The mischievous Prankman Cheng - this is another example of Middenshire influence! (You can read about it here).

6 On average, it takes giraffes two attempts to pass their driving test. It took me four. Most giraffes have 2 or 3 types of car in mind to choose from. When I passed my test, I read every brochure in our local McShyne Motors, and then bought the car I had in mind ten years before! (The most important thing is a good neck-rest).

So, dear bloggy friends - at last I have fulfilled my tag! Now I must link back to Chris Hale of The Middenshire Chronicles. (I know I did that earlier but the link here will take you to his current post). The tag consists of listing six things or habits of no real importance about yourself. I will leave this open for six people to take up, as I know it went round in March, and I can't remember who did it then! So if you would like to take up this tag, let me know - and have fun!

A Proud Dad (with Ear Defenders) ...

2009-04-05T16:14:00.000-07:00

As many of you will know, our eldest daughter Nexi is studying at Art & Design College. Her most recent assignment has been in film.

For her project, Nexi chose to film her younger sister Necky Becky, (pictured above), singing with her boyfriend Neko's band, The Stiffnex.

I expected extreme sibling storms, squalls and shrieks - but no! (Although you may dispute the latter when you watch the film). Nexi and Necky Becky worked together splendidly as a team, together with Neko on guitar, Sgruff on bass and Nukkle on drums.

So here we have it - Nexi's debut pop video, 'Be Who You Wanna Be!' with Necky Becky and The Stiffnex!

I'm a proud dad! But I'm going to hide in the kitchen until it's over ...

A Giraffodil Poem

2009-03-31T12:59:00.000-07:00

The first of April seems like a good time to make myself look a little silly!

I'm referring to my foray into writing a poem around this time last year. No-one really knew my blog existed then, so I was relatively unabashed. But now ... a good number of you are proper poets! However, I'll stick my neck out and post it again anyway.

Poetry is something I know very little about - but I know what I like! My favourite poem of all time is 'Moonlit Apples' by John Drinkwater.

I first read it during my student years and was captivated by its sense of wonder. All my life a sense of wonder has been one of my most cherished 'riches'. The Grizzled-But-Still-Incorrigible-Scribe-Himself! recently posted about wonder and describes it far better than I ever could.

Plants are one of my passions. The sight of the wild giraffodil Narcissus sylvestris ssp. giraffodil growing in woodland fills me with the most exquisite wonder.

I used the structure of 'Moonlit Apples' as an homage to John Drinkwater for all the pleasure his poem has given me.

My poetic effort and language is 'over-the-top' I know - but I suppose that is what you would expect from a giraffe!

Not in my briefcase!

2009-03-26T18:34:00.000-07:00

My friend Eleanor of Thatchwick Cottage set me the task some time ago of talking about Five items that aren't in my briefcase but ought to be there!

I do apologize for taking so long to post: firstly, we have been nextra busy with our spring entrepreneurial exploits, and secondly, most days I can't even find my briefcase!

So, I have at last caught up with myself, my time and my briefcase. However, as you will see - it is lacking in some very important contents ...

Number 1: A phone! Yes, I know ... I am very old fashioned, but I really am not a mobile phone person. Give me the stylish old proper telephones any time! But they are a little bulky to cram into my case!

Number 2: What do you notice about the smart business-giraffe in the above picture? He is carrying an umbrella! He must have a much better memory than I do, because I nearly always forget my umbrellas in cafes and shops. Therefore I really ought to have a small telescopic umbrella to keep in my briefcase.

Number 3: The focus of business is allegedly supposed to be money. Money is not my focus. Maybe this is why I usually forget to carry any with me.

Number 4: A newspaper. When I buy my Neckelchester News, I immediately scour it from end to end, preferably sitting on a sunny bench. My head full of thoughts and ideas which arise from my reading, I absent-mindedly leave the paper on the bench. I suppose it's better than carrying the paper away and forgetting my briefcase!

Number 5: The final item I ought to carry in my briefcase but do not, is a nice brew of hot tea and some food!

"Ah!" I hear you saying, "He forgets his lunch too!"

Blushingly, I have to confess, dear bloggy friends, I certainly never ever forget food. I remember it far too early in the day ... and eat it all! My lunch is devoured well before time for elevenses - my briefcase is lighter and I am not!

Over to you! I leave the picking up of this meme to my readers - if you would like to talk about five things that are not in your briefcase or handbag, but ought to be, I would be very glad to read your post!

Thank you Eleanor for setting me this task!

For everyone: Here's a question ... you now know five things I haven't got in my briefcase. Please tell me what you think I do have in my briefcase!

Spotlight on Giraffe Attire

2009-03-15T18:05:00.001-07:00

I've been pondering how customs, fashions and social style develop in our attire.

Some items of clothing or accessories start with a very pragmatic use. Take, for instance, the humble tyre. Initially invented to facilitate transport, we giraffes discovered it was also useful for learning to swim. A few tyres worn round our long necks kept us afloat as youngsters until we had mastered the crawl!

However, as the above fashion magazine picture (from our teenage daughter Nexi's bedroom) illustrates, what began sensibly has now become a rather ridiculous fashion accessory. Nexi, of course, disagrees vehemently with me! (At least I never have to carry a spare when she's on the bus with us!)

I wonder how many fashions begin completely unintentionally?

Spotlight

In my last post I had hoped to develop something that had begun as a grooming faux pas into a stylish fashion statement!

I had worried that you might all think I was standing for UK Prime Minister ... My fears were unfounded ... no-one even noticed! At first I thought you were all being polite. Then I realized, of course, you were all focussed on Derrick's lovely photos!

So here I go again - under the spotlight!

Before you all think I've gone totally neccentric, let me explain that this is all the result of reading a wonderful post by The Weaver of Grass entitled 'Is it just me?'

A Marvellous Melrose Meme Present!

2009-03-08T16:41:00.000-07:00

I had a lovely surprise the other day ... my meme present from Derrick of Melrose Musings! (This was a fun meme where the first five people to comment on Derrick's post would receive a present specially made, just for them, by Derrick himself).

You can imagine my nexcitement when I found a parcel addressed to me, just outside the secret portal behind the cacti!

I carried it safely back through the portal into Giraffe World, and rushed home to Necky Knoll House. What could it be?

Maureen and the family all watched as I opened the cardboard tube ...

There inside was an exquisitely beautiful image of Melrose Abbey, photographed and manipulated by Derrick into a lovely pastel range of colours!

"Pink!" squealed Necky Becky and Nexi simultaneously.

"How atmospheric and serene!" sighed Maureen.

As I held up the picture, I realized that there was not only one present, but two! Underneath was a print of the original photograph Derrick had taken of the Abbey ... wonderful!

We lost no time in getting both pictures framed, so we could hang them on our walls! You can see them both here in the frames made for us by Gaffer Giraffter of Our Neck of the Woods Timber.

As they were my present, I chose the room. "Definitely the sitting room, where they will be most seen and appreciated by us and all our guests!" I said.

As a family we thought we'd try different placings near our fireplace.

Maureen, Littl' Nicky and I all agreed that they looked best hung one-over-the-other next to the fireplace.

My sister Nektareeni and Girth preferred them one on either side.

Nexi, of course, had to reorganize everything ... She took the mirror from above the fireplace and repositioned it upright on the wall next to the fire. (So she could get a full view of herself - I'm sure she managed to stretch the mirror, it wasn't that big before!)

Necky Becky stated that we could have the original photograph over the fire, but she wanted the pink and pastel one for her attic room ...

Help me, dear bloggy friends!

Where do you think these lovely pictures look best?

And Derrick, a most hearty THANK YOU from all of us at Necky Knoll House!

Goldheart

2009-03-02T17:21:00.000-08:00

Tom Atkins' lovely poem 'Ivy' set me thinking about my favourite ivy, Goldheart. (Hedera helix 'Goldheart' if you like your Latin!)

As well as admiring the plant, I've always loved the name. Goldheart! Heart of Gold ... It conjures up all good things: kindness, generosity, loyalty, inner beauty, love.

My train of thought has continued on to remember the many 'Goldhearts' in my life.

I am keenly aware of the recession and economic trials currently on planet Earth, so my focus has been on people who have helped me at times of extreme economic pressure in my own life.

When Maureen and I have gone through hardship, unable even to buy food, there have been Goldhearts. Folk who have brought provisions ... It has seemed quite significant that these were not often from the comfortably off or the wealthy. On the contrary, many could be referred to as the 'have nots'. Yet they shared what they had: half a loaf of bread ... some fruit ... cereal ...

In those dark times they shone like beacons - and they will always continue to do so in my memory and in my heart.

Sometimes it is a word of encouragement or affirmation that is given. When my neck is wilting at the obstacles on a chosen path, the word 'Yes!' can make me stand up straight and stick my neck out for my dreams once more!

'Yes, I know you will make it through!' ... 'Yes, you have what it takes!'

At other times what we may need to sustain us is beauty. Beauty in nature, inner beauty, the beauty of art.

One of my very favourite blog posts, which made me cry many tears of joy, is 'Beauty' by L. Rochelle at Two Ghosts.

Gold in the pocket is very nice . Gold in the heart is beyond price.

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One whole year of blogging!

On 3rd March I will have been blogging for a year! Most of you will not have read my earlier posts, as I didn't enable the Comments facility until around December. If you would like to read my first post, on March 3rd 2008, click on The Escape of a Giraffe Accountant!

I have thoroughly enjoyed the year - but by far the most fun has been meeting all of you wonderful bloggers, reading your posts and exchanging comments. Thank you dear bloggy friends!

Trachelus Aplombus

2009-02-21T10:35:00.001-08:00

What a nexcitingly busy week it has been! Dear bloggy friends, I have hardly had the time to visit you all - we have been so up-to-the-neck in our entrepreneurial Tours preparations. But now at last I have blissful moments to write another blog post ...

Before we continue with our little kitchen story, I thought I would introduce you to our wonderful plumber and AFF Gas engineer, Rich, aka Trachelus Aplombus. As Barbara Martin so observantly commented on my last post, Rich wears a helmet and what looks like a neck brace.

Allow me to explain. For his 'day job' Rich is chief engineer at the AFF Gas Station. (AFF stands for Anatomically Friendly Flatulence, our ecologically sound renewable energy source). And what a nexcellent engineer he is - always ready to help his friends with their plumbing and appliances.

However, Rich's talents and interests extend far further, right back into our ancient history! Under the pen-name Trachelus Aplombus, Rich has written several most neckworthy history books, including 'Myths & Legends of Giraffe World' and 'The Historie of Knollshire'.

We are very lucky indeed to have him act as Guide on our Giraffe World Tours. At the end of a day working on the pipes at the AFF Gas Station, Rich removes his boilersuit with a flambuoyant flourish, and lo! There he stands resplendent in full centurion's uniform - helmet, neckpieces - all lovingly restored and polished.

Two of my favourite historical paintings are in his Knollshire book. (I do have his permission to reproduce them on my blog!)

The first shows a centurion gazing over the parapet of our historic Wall, The Long Neck. The Long Neck was built along the northern edge of Knollshire many centuries ago. Not, of course, for purposes of war! The story of the Wall is best told by Trachelus Aplombus himself, and I shall hopefully not keep you waiting too long for this pleasure ...

The Sentries of the Neck were highly trained. Our game Giraffe World Hopscotch was first devised for them as a fitness nexercise.

Sentries of the Neck were not allowed to marry until their time of service was over. However, many of them had an 'unofficial' wife living at one of the villages along The Long Neck, with whom they raised a family ready to move in with when they were discharged. The picture above shows such a sentry throwing a rose down to his beloved, while his companions pretend not to notice!

Hearts of the Home

2009-02-15T14:39:00.000-08:00

I hope you have all had a splendid Valentine's Day, dear bloggy friends!

We spent the evening in rumbustious revelry at the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant. There was singing, dancing, giraffe charades and of course, mountains of glorious food. Sometimes Maureen and I opt for a romantic candle-lit dinner a deux. This year we decided to warm our chilly environs with a whooping great hearty hullaballoo!

On the subject of hearts, the two images above are the cards Maureen and I exchanged. My heart always races when I open mine each year!

Dear friends, I would also like to share with you the heart of our home - our kitchen! My friend Poetikat recently let us wander round her kitchen and study, so I thought it was about time you all saw something of the interior of Necky Knoll House.

This picture was taken when we moved into our lovely home last spring. I apologize for the mess, but I suppose moving house is a reasonable excuse! Our utensils were unpacked, but we hadn't found places for them, and there was still the washing machine to plumb in, the cooker to test and all those never-ending new home jobs.

You'll notice some folk you haven't met before. I won't confuse you by introducing them all today. Neither will I burden you with a too-lengthy post.

But I will tease you with the beginning of a humorous little story from our first meal at Necky Knoll House ...

Parsneck Soup

A large sweaty face peers round the kitchen door ...

After nearly deafening us with his hollering, Girth bangs loudly on the dinner gong.

A peek round the door reveals chaos. Rolling pins and cutlery poke out of boxes and crates ... A large dining table is partially set with long handled knives and forks.

As we enter, my glamorous sister Nektareeni greets us with a glass of special wine.

"Necks up everybody! "

'G' is for Gleeful!

2009-02-11T15:17:00.001-08:00

Several days ago, Willow gave me the letter 'G' to post about! We have been busy planning some of our Giraffe World Tours outings for the spring, which has been great fun, but time consuming. At last I am able to wax lyrical about my favourite letter of the alphabet! (How did Willow guess?)

Well, first of all 'G' stands for Gleeful. What a wonderful word in sound and in meaning ... For giraffes it perfectly describes our preferred state of mind, and can be acted out by jumping up and down shouting 'Wheeeeee!'

Next on my list is 'Greedy'. I know this can have negative connotations, but we use it in the same way as humans would say 'eager', or 'appreciative'. In Neckelchester village, 'Gleeful + Greedy = Restaurant!' Which brings me to word number three: Girth. Proud proprietor of the afore-mentioned eating establishment. Broad in build and broad in grin. Of course! Grin - another lovely g-word!

Here we have one of Girth's creations. A gorgeous gateau, which could also be a girthday cake! Feeling greedy anyone?

Talking of gorgeous ...

My glamorous sister Nektareeni! Adored by her partner Girth, she jointly runs the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant with him, as well as her own fashion boutique.

More beauty below,

Giraffodils! Their gracefully nodding blooms always gladden our hearts in the spring. (There are so many happy g-words, aren't there?)

Exploring the coutryside while planning our Tours today, we noticed shy little shoots of pale spring green popping out here and there. One of my very favourite colours! Green seems to mean the same to you Earthlings as it does to Camelopardalians - a concern for our environment. All things are inter-conneckted: I remember Barbara Martin commenting somewhere about the constellations being metaphysically linked in a grid.

Have you noticed how onomatopoeic so many g-words are? Writing the word 'grid' made me think of gurgle and glug! And that fabulous word gargle!

We giraffes just love to gargle! At Neckelchester Dental Practice we have clean-your-tongue-to-music sessions, and we always like to end with our Giraffe Gargling Song. I must put it in the side bar for you all to listen to, one day!

Have you ever tried saying, 'How much oil could a gargoyle gargle, if a gargoyle could gargle oil?' Try it now!

My next word is giggle - which is probably what you are all doing now if you attempted the tongue-twister ...

And so we come to my penultimate g-word, which is simply 'G'! My middle name ... Raph G. Neckmann. And Raph G. turned around is G. Raph ...

Let me hear you all shout it: Giraffe!

Dear bloggy friends! I hope you all enjoyed our little etymological frolic ... Many thanks to Willow for my favourite letter.

Cygnus Camelopardalis

2009-02-06T15:50:00.001-08:00

Neckelchester School and Raffsburgh College were closed again today because of the snow, so the whole family were at home. Rising very early this morning, I looked out of the window of Necky Knoll House. The light outside looked luminescent and mysterious.

"A walk in the snow," said Maureen. Her eyes shone as she turned towards me. "To the Gardens!"

We tramped across fields, through the shadowy Forest and beyond. All the while the light grew stronger and the shimmering mist dispersed.

"I want to see the Swans!" whispered Littl' Nicky, looking up at the sky.

Our swans, Cygnus camelopardalis, are unusual birds. Large and graceful, their flight across the winter sky is awe inspiring. Like mythical creatures from distant constellations, silent and majestic, their huge wings move slowly as they head for their secret nesting grounds.

However, they have a mischievous streak.

Much bigger than Littl' Nicky, strong yet friendly, the birds have a penchant for heavy metal objects, which they pilfer prodigiously. Only last week we caught one making off with Necky Becky's new sledge! As she rushed out of the house it flew off, making loud tooting noises.

But in the Gardens, Cygnus camelopardalis appear silent, serene and a little numinous.

As we came out from the trees by the lake, the rushes parted and a swan glided into view. Graceful, elegant, yet with a quizzical almost cheeky look on its face. Noiselessly it passed us and grew smaller and smaller as it made its way across the water.

We sighed and continued on our walk in a kind of rapturous silence.

Yet ... strange though it may seem, I'm sure that as it passed by, Cygnus camelopardalis winked at us!

Wolliecobblies: Comments cause a Haiku!

2009-02-02T11:34:00.000-08:00

One of the things I so love about blogging is how it creatively and humorously brings together people from all over the world, (and beyond!).

I hadn't intended to post for a couple of days, but this 'thread' just had to be woven into the fabric of the blogosphere immediately!

In my previous post I suggested that folk have fun thinking of a caption for Littl' Nicky's speech bubble. If you go to the Comments you will see how this evolved ...

Bindu suggested for the caption, 'It's good to eat, but also good to toss into the air and catch!'

I responded by saying 'Catch the cauliflower would be a good new sport! Or using raquets, a bit like badminton, but with cauliflower florets ...'

The Weaver of Grass commented, 'As for the speech bubble, I am guessing he cannot speak all that well yet and feel he might be saying "more wolliecobblies".'

My response to Weaver's glorious word 'wolliecobblies' included noting 'I wonder if it could be incorporated into a haiku?' (If you read Weaver's recent posting you will see some of her beautiful haikus there).

The brilliant Sepiru Chris (also an accomplished Haiku writer - see his recent posts), wrote 'You ask, I deliver:' and sent the haiku which he had written!

I'll type it again here just in case the text isn't clear in the speech bubble:

Wolliecobblies haiku:

Serve wolliecobblies.

Follow with eyes; swing racket!

Thwack; microflorets.

Thank you for putting your necks together in this way, my wonderful bloggy friends! My thanks also to all of you who commented and came up with fun captions - do please read them all in the previous post's Comments ...

Knollshire Cauliwobblies in a Secret Sauce

2009-02-01T16:49:00.001-08:00

Reading about The Solitary Walker and The-Grizzled-But-Still-Incorrigible-Scribe-Himself!'s delicious soda bread recipes has inspired me! As I mentioned in a previous post, my culinary efforts usually just extend to chutney. However, today I decided to make my Knollshire Cauliwobblies in a Secret Sauce, and to share the recipe with you, dear bloggy friends.

Fear not - I will not give away any giraffe secrets - the meaning of my 'Secret Sauce' is that it varies every time I cook it. The game is that the family have to guess what is in it each time!

The recipe for the version we have eaten today is as follows:

Ingredients:

1 cauliflower for each adult giraffe. (I leave you to judge the amount for humans).

Sauce: (I hazard a guess that this may serve 4 humans).

1 onion finely chopped

1 red pepper finely chopped

Garlic (we put a whole garlic bulb in - crushed, of course. You may prefer a little less).

1 banana medium sliced

Lots of mushrooms!

A pinch of curry powder, (your preferred style).

A little sunflower or other cooking oil

Half a mug of milk.

For the decoration:

2 large thin slices of cheese

Method:

Separate the cauliflower florets and boil in a large pan of water.

Saute the onion in the oil and add garlic, chopped pepper and mushrooms and saute some more.

Add the curry powder and sliced banana, and saute.

Stir in the milk, and boil up into a thick sauce. (You may wish to add more milk depending on how ferociouly you boil, and how runny you like your sauce).

Drain the cauliflower and arrange on plates in a circle. Pour the sauce into the middle and decorate with the cheese. We like to cut the cheese slices so that they melt into the shapes of giraffe markings!

Delicious served with a chilled glass of medium sweet white wine, or apple juice.

Littl' Nicky has his portion all mashed up.

I've put a blank speech bubble on this picture of him especially for you, my bloggy friends ... What fun for you to think up a caption to go in the bubble!

(And if you try the recipe, don't forget to let me know how you liked it!)

Giraffe Grooming - the only drawback of having Lots of Neck!

2009-01-29T17:36:00.001-08:00

Since leaving accountancy, I can say with gratitude and gladness that I enjoy just about everything I do.

However, there has been one thing ... one irritating, time-consuming interminable activity which I have to grumblingly go through each-and-every day ... washing my mane!

I don't mind having a shower, brushing my teeth or gargling, but - oh the tediousness of mane washing!

Do any of you dear readers feel like this?

First it is the shampooing - TWICE - then the repetetive rinsing, which always goes in my ears. Finally the ultimate unending ritual of the drying.

When you have a neck as long as mine - what more need I say!

On the other side of the neck, our eldest daughter Nexi seems to find enlightenment and bliss staring into a misty mirror, manedrier in hand. She not only dries her mane, she styles it!

Necky Becky is grumpy about her own grooming, (apart from dying her fur pink), yet surprisingly helpful with her baby brother. Littl' Nicky in turn very conscientiously brushes his toy giraffe Goo-Goo.

It's funny, isn't it, how an uninteresting topic like mane-washing can turn philosophical. Take the whole concept of beauty, for instance. Is beauty in the eye of the beholder, the eye of the beheld, or the mind of both?

My glamorous sister, Nektareeni, obviously spends a lot of time (and money) on her looks. I think she looks fine. Her partner Girth worships her as giraffe goddess!

But for me, no one can compare with my Maureen. Her natural inner glow, her sweet spirit shining through her eyes, and that wonderful enigmatic smile ...

For Maureen, I wash my mane!

Celebration of Nexcellence: Robert Tunstall's Music!

2009-01-26T13:36:00.000-08:00

I was neckstatic when I listened to Robert Tunstall's music .. what a presence in the blogosphere! Dear bloggy friends, in WellAdjustedRob's blog he tells us about his compositions and you can listen to them on last fm. I urge you to - they are brilliant!

My favourite is Suite Ajigasawa Part 2. As you know, I love Shostakovich, so when WellAdjustedRob referred in a recent post to his influence, I was intrigued. Once I heard one track I had to sit and listen to the lot.

(I'd intended to post one of my favourite Runrig tracks last night to coincide with Burns Night, as I know that many of you were celebrating. Apologies to Runrig, but I spent all the time I had available listening to Robert Tunstall!)

As well as the phenomenal instrumentals, Robert has many other tracks where he 'plays his cello like a guitar'!

I am a fan!

A MEME

Jeane at ARTIT recently invited us to participate in a meme, to which I joyfully responded because it will mean I get something made by her! A work of art by Jeane? Yes please!! I also couldn't resist responding to Derrick's (Melrose Musings) posting of the same meme - the thought of a Melrose memento is so appealing!

Here's the meme which I now offer to you, dear readers!

I have altered it a little, (as Jeane did), to accommodate my intergalactic situation. I am also limiting it to bloggers with whom I have fairly regular two way interaction ...

Here it is:

The first five of you to comment requesting this will get something made by me. My choice. For you!

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations;

- What I create will be just for you, (the copyright remains mine).

- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!

- You will receive your item by email, or if you prefer not to give your email address, it will just be posted up on my blog for you.

- You will receive the item before the end of the year, or sooner.

- You will have no clue what I am going to make.

If you wish, you can repost this meme and make and send out five surprises of your own. But no obligation here! Like many, I do not like any 'chain' implications of memes. However, it would be such fun to create special surprises for five of my dear bloggy friends!

How do we know we are real?

2009-01-21T17:24:00.001-08:00

I have been over the moon since receiving the Premio Dardos Award. However, one small thing had been bothering me. Barbara Martin, when nominating me, wrote in her blog, 'Raph Neckmann has imagined a wonderful world of giraffes ...'

Imagined! My home, our village, Knollshire - my family?! Are they really here? Do I actually exist? What is reality ... ?

I called out to Maureen to help me out of this quasi-existentialist quagmire.

"Of course we are here, dear," she said, "We've just had tea!"

I am reassured - no doubts now.

Our eldest daughter Nexi added, "We don't live in an imaginary world, Dad, but you do most of the time!"

Necky Becky offered to kick me in the shins to prove my reality.

Normality restored to our household, I spent a pleasant evening and retired to bed with a quiet mind.

However, I woke much later in the night aghast. I'd had a dream where all my beloved blogger friends, the humans I've been interacting with in the blogosphere, turned out to be fellow-giraffes! Giraffes, not humans! Have I been hoodwinked?

The thought unsettled me so much, I had to get out of bed. Tiptoeing downstairs, I went out to the garden to look through my new telescope. I turned it towards the galaxy where lies planet Earth. Slowly a great sense of calm fell over me. So very, very far away from our own Camelopardalis constellation, yet I can talk with them ...

The sense of the unfathomable was so strong it brought peace. All was still in the garden and the air smelled good.

Premio Dardos Award!

2009-01-20T15:57:00.000-08:00

I had a lovely surprise this morning to find that Barbara Martin has given me the 'Premio Dardos' award! Thank you so much, Barbara, I am honoured!

(Being something of a non-technically-savvy giraffe, after several attempts, I have not yet been able to copy and paste the award from Barbara's blog ... hence my temporary fix in the above image!! I'd appreciate instructions in my comments - in the meantime, perhaps my nominees would be able to collect their award image via Barbara Martin's blog?)

The award 'Premio Dardos' is for the appreciation of merits - culturally, literary and individually - of every blogger who expresses him/herself on his/her blog.

1. be tickled pink ;)

2. copy and paste the award picture to your blog;

3. write down the regulations;

4. link the blog who bestowed you the Award;

5. and finally nominate 15 blogs for the Award.

As Barbara mentions on her blog, there have been comments that the awards are like chain mail letters. Therefore there is no obligation to take this up. I too have chosen 11 nominees, and these may choose whether or not to nominate others for the award:

1. The Weaver of Grass; A farmer's wife living in the Yorkshire Dales, The Weaver of Grass writes outstanding poetry. Her daily postings also feature her countryside, local history and everyday events portrayed in such a way that I'm eagerly waiting for the next post!

2. Melrose Musings; Derrick of Melrose posts compellingly about a range of subjects, from opera to his extensive travels to local interest.

3. Life at Willow Manor; Willow's uplifting posts cover a diverse range of cultural and creative subjects.

4. Poetikat's Blasts from the Past; A wonderful trip down memory lane - reminders of our early days stirring up memories we may have forgotten and creating new ones!

5. Passport Diaries; Marigirl's amazing documentation of her travels. Currently in Japan, she gives unusual and riveting glimpses into the culture of many countries.

6. ARTIT; Following the progress of Jeane's artworks is an inspiration!

7. From The House of Edward; Pamela Terry's elegant and charming writing and images lift the spirits. Edward is irresistable!

8. Thatchwick Cottage; Eleanor's warm welcome to her lovely garden and her descriptions and photographs of South Africa give inspiring insights into her country.

9. Summit Manor; The poems and photographs of Tom Atkins lift the spirit!

10. The Solitary Walker; A visit here challenges my thinking. Poetry, excerpts from books and SW's own writing all make me ponder through the day, before writing my comments.

11. The Middenshire Chronicles; One of my very favourites, Chris Hale is an excellent wordsmith who writes about a range of topics and encourages interaction and the sharpening of one's own wit - an irresistable blog!

Thank you all you wonderful bloggers for enriching my life - you all well deserve your awards! Thank you again to Barbara Martin.

Garden Design - Giraffe Style! (Part Two)

2009-01-16T11:35:00.001-08:00

As Littl' Nicky helped me dig this morning, I benefitted from his untrammelled imagination as he chattered about his ideas for summer planting themes!

He was eager to help me sort my photographs for today's post. Yes! Our Interneck connection is restored - I can publish again ...

Having concluded my previous post with a photo of my plot freshly dug and ready to overwinter, I will begin with another side-view.

Here we have the specified vegetables to the right, and my emerging garden design on the left.

Now, follow me round to the front of the design ...

*The following photo is actually two photographs stuck together, (small pre-digital camera!!) I've 'healed' the join but it is still a little visible.

Your first view of a Giraffe Garden in progress! High nibbleable trees and the beginnings of the summer display of mixed planting with food, fragrance and colour.

You may be wondering how I contrived to grow tall trees so swiftly - I did not ... These are very long prunings from willows. I merely stuck them in the ground in the early winter to root and grow leaves. Instant height from material which would otherwise have been discarded.

A closer look at the fence reveals more willow. I chose different coloured stems to weave into the pattern, and echoed the colours in the planting scheme.

I love warm shades of orange, yellow and red in flowers and foliage. The path to the little seating area was edged with white ageratum and zaluzianskya capensis for heavenly perfume. Close to the fence grew taller leaf beet rhubarb chard, bronze fennel and up against the willow trees I planted sunflowers - Helianthus 'Pastiche'.

Carrying on the theme of mixed food and decorative plants, you can see lettuce 'Lollo Rossa' and 'Sangria' among the marigolds. Part of our task as students was to grow our own plants from seed in the college glasshouses, giving us the rewarding experience of tending our plants right from their beginnings.

Amaranthus caudatus 'Crimson', Basil 'Purple Ruffles' and Antirrhinum 'Black Prince' continue the colour scheme in a cascade of height and colour.

I loved my little plot! All summer we tended and watered our handiwork, and when the course came to an end, it was a real wrench to leave. Happy memories indeed!

So, my friends ... your introduction to Giraffe Gardening. I hope you have enjoyed the experience!

NB: I've just read a beautiful and evocative garden poem by Tom Atkins at Summit Manor - call over there and read it!

Garden Design - Giraffe Style! (Part One)

2009-01-13T12:28:00.001-08:00

Our toddler Littl' Nicky announced this morning that he wanted to help with our yearly garden planning. I suggested a stroll outside, as it was a bright day. He led the way on a grand tour of the environs of Necky Knoll House. There was such a lot to see ... I sometimes make the mistake of thinking there's not much going on in a garden at this time of year - Littl' Nicky does not. He missed nothing!

With regard to the design of a giraffe garden, I suspect ours have a slightly taller emphasis than yours, dear bloggy friends. We often juxtapose low ground-cover with very high planting, which could possibly look a little out of balance in a human garden.

Littl' Nicky has asked me to show you a picture of his best sunflower from last summer. It grew very happily by our back porch, flourishing under his conscientious watering and friendly chatter.

While looking for Littl' Nicky's sunflower picture, I came across some old photographs I had almost forgotten. Many years ago I took a part-time course in Horticulture at Raffsburgh College. (Such a rapturous and necessary contrast to work, during my accounting years!) One of our tasks was to create our own garden. Each student was allocated a long strip of land, half of which was to be planted with specified vegetables, with the other half left to our budding designer imaginations! All herbaceous plants and vegetables had to be grown by us from seed.

I leave you with this photograph of my plot at the glorious digging stage. Ah, the smell of the turned earth as it thudded off my garden fork - I remember it all!

Next post - the finished design! (Can you bear to wait?)

NB: Note to my bloggy friends: Thursday - I'm having trouble with my Interneck connection at present so please be patient regarding the next post - Garden Design Part Two. I had intended to publish it today!

An Interview with Classic Independence!

2009-01-11T05:41:00.001-08:00

It has been a priviledge to interview Classic Independence. Please click on Muse See Do for a most interesting and inspiring read, and to leave your comments there.

Thank you Classic Independence! I have really enjoyed interviewing you and your answers have given me some great things to ponder through the day.

Interviewed by Willow!

2009-01-09T12:16:00.000-08:00

What an honour! I am being interviewed by Willow!

Pondering Willow's questions during the small hours gave me much food for thought and I filled several sheets of paper with my ruminations ... I've cut out a lot of my giraffe waffle and streamlined my answers to blog-size!

At the end of the post I will give an invitation to you, fellow bloggers, to be interviewed by me.

Here are Willow's wonderful interview questions!

1. How did you meet your inspiration, the lovely Ms. Maureen?

My first meeting with Maureen Treeging, my dear wife? Ah, now that is a whole story in itself! One that is complex, emotional and far too lengthy to be told in a few sentences. I will not spoil the story for you for the future; for now I give you the setting:

'On the wild Neckmoors north of Raffsburgh grows a forest ...'

2. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

The word 'perfect' makes this question particularly interesting! Lots of things make me 'ordinarily' happy, most of them quite simple, such as a nice cup of tea or a walk in the woods, and of course, the company of folk I love and like.

However, I see happiness more as a choice - and a very active state of mind, rather than a reaction to pleasant things. I desire what is often referred to as 'background happiness' - the state of being free from 'what if?' thoughts and niggly worries, even in worrying circumstances. This requires, (for me), a lot of hard graft, practise and mental discipline, but - oh yes - it does work! Gradually ...

Then there are those transcendent moments of happiness, which are closest to perfection ... those unbidden 'glimpses' - when suddenly there is an upsurge of pure joy, a bubbling of a kind of golden fountain that seems to rise from within. Difficult to describe, but you'll know what I mean if you get them too!

3. What is your most marked characteristic?

My neck? Probably, to humans - although in Giraffe World it is very commonplace!

Or maybe my perpetual expression of bemused intelligence??

4. Other than your loved ones, what is your most treasured possession?

I appreciate and enjoy all my many possessions, but those things I treasure most I do not 'possess'. You cannot hold them, I feel they kind of flow through you and multiply by sharing; hope, love, affection, encouragement, inspiration and humour - oh yes, exuberant, gleeful humour!

(And I am very fond of my new telescope!)

5. What is your motto?

'Stick Your Neck Out For Your Dreams!'

Or in its longer version: 'Giraffitude! finding out who you are and sticking your neck out for your dreams with integrity, respect for others and gleeful fun!'

Thank you for interviewing me, Willow!

Here are the directions;

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. (I get to pick the questions).

3.You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Go on - stick your neck out and dare ... I'll be nice to you!

Do, please still leave comments, even if you don't want to be interviewed - I love your comments!

Hearty, Healthy Takeaway Meals!

2009-01-08T03:04:00.000-08:00

All the seasonal talk about dieting is making me think about food constantly ...

It therefore seems like a good time to give you a little 'taste' of Girth's hearty healthy takeaway meals. There is not really a lot I need to say about them other than that they are delicious, highly nutritious and exceedingly popular. It would appear that the residents of Neckelchester hardly cook at all, so in demand are the Gleeful & Greedy meals!

Maybe one day Girth will let me post one or two of his secret recipes!

Our Family Favourites

2009-01-05T13:06:00.000-08:00

Necky Becky has insisted that I include a post about our favourite presents this year! Who am I to argue ...

First of all, she would have everyone know that her 'bestest pressie' was the pencil case printed with the image of a wild giraffe sticking it's tongue out. A pose which she now proudly emulates whenever she can!

Next in her order of importance is, of course, her beloved Neckshund dog Hals. He received a football, which we have all fallen over several times in the last week.

Nexi couldn't decide which of her presents was her favourite - she loves them all. She received lots of nailvarnish and other strong-smelling items with which to paint herself, her room, everyone else's room, and anything else she can get her hands on.

Toddler Littl' Nicky also follows the artistic line and has been enjoying his new paints and easel. His painting below is a portrait of me.

Which leaves Maureen and I! We had many beautiful gifts. Maureen received a bottle of her favourite honey drink, I have a subscription to the Raffsburgh Astronomical Society, and we both have stacks of new books to read.

Best of all is our special Intergalactic Viewing Box. Fitted to our TV, it receives many extra Planet Earth channels, enabling us to see some of the wonderful films and music performances recommended by our dear new bloggy friends!

Feeding our World's Tallest Giraffe

2009-01-03T11:16:00.000-08:00

The Weaver of Grass and The Solitary Walker both left such kind comments on my New Year's Day post, regarding the abundance of my food supply.

This jogged something in my memory about an article in the Knollshire News a few years ago. I have managed to find it in our cuttings file.

A nextraordinarily tall wild giraffe had appeared on the Neckmoors north of Raffsburgh. The Rangers were concerned that she couldn't comfortably bend her long neck sufficiently to reach down to the trees for food. After much discussion it was decided to charter a helicopter to fly up portions of fresh green shoots from the nearby Biomass Plantation.

(We have a dual energy supply here in Knollshire, from Biomass and our AFF Gas).

'Granny' as she was affectionately named, spent a year on the Neckmoors, before heading north towards the Far Mountains. It is believed that other Giraffa camelopardalis giganteum dwell there, so we hope she has found plenty of friends - and food!

Necky Knoll New Year Greetings!

2009-01-01T04:12:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year Everyone! To all our friends, human and giraffe, bloggers and readers!

Our fancy dress party yesterday was hilarious! After wishing our guests a merry farewell, we grabbed a couple of hours' sleep, then got up to watch our early Giraffe World sunrise.

Gathered on our drive, we experienced a magical moment as the sun emerged from the grey sky. Shafts of golden light illuminated the Knollshire landscape and the copses of bare trees seemed to reach up to drink in the new sunlight. We stood in silence for a few moments. Gently Maureen started to sing our special family song, 'With our Necks Entwined'. (Click on song title to hear).

May your Year be luminous, harmonious and fun, dear friends!

Birthday Greetings to our special friend, Brendy Neckson!

Sharp Dressed Neckmann

2008-12-30T15:01:00.001-08:00

I've decided on my costume for our New Year's Eve Fancy Dress Party!

Initially I had thought of going as Prankman Cheng, but it would have been too complicated for Nexi to sew at such short notice. Who could I be? I was getting my neck in a bit of a twist about it, so I started singing to cheer myself up. As I began one of my favourite songs, 'Sharp Dressed Man', there I had it! I'll be 'Sharp Dressed Neckmann' - in true ZZ Top attire!

Nexi threw up her hands in mock despair when I told her, and said I'd be better calling myself 'Zzzz Up Top'. However, she promised to get my costume together - just a beard, hat and dark glasses really. I'm borrowing one of Neko's guitars, (as long as I promise not to play it ...)

How on earth am I going to eat my sprouts and New Year Pudding with this on?

I've been watching a film of the song, so I get all the actions right. I love the bit where they both kind of bend their knees in synchronisation.

This is going to be fantastic - I so love this track! Hey, everybody ... does Raph rock?!!

Sport, sport, marvellous sport, permits a giraffe some sobriety ..

2008-12-28T11:30:00.000-08:00

I have no interest in sport whatsoever. Oh, but how grateful I am to benefit from a sibling-squabble-free environment, thanks to marvellous sport!

Nukkle has taken his nephew and Necky Becky to the football match in Raffsburgh. Littl' Nicky is at the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant with his auntie and uncle, where they are holding their annual 'Bounciest Custard' competition.

Nexi and her boyfriend Neko have gone ice skating.

What a haven of peace and tranquillity for Maureen and me! Maureen is at her beautiful carved desk by the window, writing with her antique quill pen. I am at the kitchen table typing on my necktop.

We've had a wonderful family time over the last few days, but isn't it lovely to get a bit of peace!

Season's Greetings to all our Friends!

2008-12-24T09:32:00.000-08:00

Warmest Season's Greetings to all our Friends!

Special Good Wishes to all my wonderful new bloggy friends - those who are Google subscribers and also all my other readers. May you have a wonderful Christmas and much happy blogging henceforth!

La Vie En Rose

2008-12-23T09:38:00.000-08:00

Maureen and I were listening to the legendary Edith Piaf yesterday evening. Dancing together to 'La Vie En Rose', I felt a huge 'Thank You' to Maureen welling up in my heart.

2008 has been a momentous year for me; escaping from accountancy, moving house and setting up the new business. Through it all Maureen has been there, encouraging, affirming, keeping my feet on the ground, steering me away from my wilder ideas, and above all being with me.

In all the hurly-burly of business, balance sheets and trying to make ends meet, it is easy to overlook the unmeasurable support of one's loved ones. It may be your partner, a family member or a special friend.

Who has helped you most on the path of your dreams this year? Give them a special token of your appreciation today ...

A little 'Vie En Rose' goes a long way!

(Special Christmas message from I.S. to I.P)

Not all Giraffes like Sprouts!

2008-12-22T09:41:00.001-08:00

One of the things about blogging that is so fascinating is reading about your wonderful human traditions and customs. I am learning that sprouts are a very important item on the menu in winter and part of your festivities.

Here in Giraffe World sprouts play a large part in our staple diet - all year round. We have developed many different varieties to stagger growth throughout the seasons. Not only do we find them delicious, they also provide most of our eco-friendly energy supply - AFF Gas.

I was so pleased today to discover an exciting new recipe for Sprout Soup on one of my favourite blogs - you can find it on Melrose Musings. It sounds exquisite, and I shall inform Girth of the recipe this evening. It will be on our tables forthwith!

However, not all of us will partake. Necky Becky has steadfastly refused sprouts all her young life! She prefers to eat chocolate.

Girth and Cake

2008-12-21T09:03:00.001-08:00

Here at Necky Knoll House the words 'Girth' and 'cake' are synonymous, and they've both just arrived on our doorstep.

Allow me to introduce our own celebrity chef and his glamorous partner, Nektareeni, (who happens to be my sister).

Together they run the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant in the village, and what a popular eating place it is!

Passionate about cooking, (and Nektareeni!), Girth loves to try out his new recipes over here. His booming voice fills the entire house as he mutters and chortles over his creations. "Foooood, get it down your necks everybody!"

Later this evening we'll be dining on Spicy Parsneck Soup, followed by Nektareeni's Hotlipped Hotpot. Our dessert will be Gleeful & Greedy Custard Pudding. All are cherished recipes of Girth's, tried and tested here and famous throughout Knollshire!

For now, we're going to start on the cake ...

Posting instead of posting ...

2008-12-19T07:30:00.000-08:00

The last couple of days have been so busy, I haven't had time to post until now! Maureen and I have been writing all our cards to make sure we get them sent off on time.

Our toddler son Littl' Nicky accompanied us to the village very early this morning. It was rather foggy, but we had no trouble spotting the post-box!

As we made our way home, the mist dispersed, and the winter sun shone majestically from behind the clouds. We walked the rest of the way in a silent yet exuberant reverie. We love our world.

Anagrams and Alter Egos

2008-12-17T11:54:00.001-08:00

Hail O Wordsmith of Middenshire!

I received today such splendid anagrams of my name from the above gentleman. They are listed here as he wrote them:

Graph McKennan

Ken McPhragann

Prankman Cheng

The rather mysterious;

N. Phanckmanger

and a law enforcement officer;

PC Hank Germann.

What wonderful times I would have with these characters as alter egos! As Graph McKennan I would be a cult comic artist. I'd run a successful haulage company as Ken McPhragann's Wagons. The rather mysterious N. Phanckmanger would be a rich banker, and as PC Hank Germann I'd be able to read people's thoughts.

But best of all I'd like to be Prankman Cheng! What a transformation for mild-mannered me ...

Thank you!

Aptenodytes Giraffa

2008-12-16T11:56:00.000-08:00

I haven't told you about our Giraffe World Tours outing on Sunday, have I?

We had decided, by popular demand, to have a mid-winter trip to see the penguin colonies. After picking up our tourists at the village green, we headed seaward and along the coast to the mountains. There is a route through the peaks via Narrowneck Pass which is kept clear of snow by the mountain dwellers, and there was just room for our bus.

Once over the other side, we gasped at the immense and awe-inspiring landscape which stretched before us. Folds and hollows, peaks and crevasses of snow and ice in spectral colours of astounding beauty.

I parked the bus at the bottom of a gentle slope so we could all stretch our legs. Looking back, Necky Becky and her neckshund Hals were the only moving forms in this silent scene.

It was too cold to walk very far, so we settled back into our snug seats on the bus to continue on our quest for penguins. The rare long-necked penguin, (Aptenodytes giraffa), can only be found in this region and it is a fortunate visitor who gets a glimpse of these affable creatures.

Our luck was in!

There at the edge of the snow-field a small group of the penguins came waddling past. As we slowed down, they turned their heads from side to side and looked almost as if they were nodding a giraffe greeting!

We did not stop, for fear of disturbing them. I felt quite moved, and pondered on the inter-connectedness of everything as I drove our bus homeward. I wonder if there are penguins on other planets?

Our Daughter has the Nex Factor!

2008-12-15T10:06:00.001-08:00

The Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant was packed on Saturday evening for the local final of the Nex Factor. It seemed as though every giraffe in the county was there to hear the finalists sing.

To cut a long story short, our family song and my sister Nektareeni's song didn't make the top three. The winner of the competition was an outstanding young singer, Nexandra.

However, there was a surprise in store for us ... Our middle child Necky Becky was awarded a special prize! When she gave her neck-bending rendering of 'Be Who You Wanna Be!' backed by local band The Stiffnex, she totally won the audience and judges over. She was way too young to enter, but had jumped up on stage last week anyway. Everyone said she had more neck than anyone, and it was decided to award her the accolade of 'The Neckiest Factor!'

You can listen to her song here: 'Be Who You Wanna Be!'

(NB: Necky Becky has just pointed out that her long-term ambition is to be a gardener, not a pop-star - but she doesn't see why that should stop her from singing if she wants to).

The Glorious Giraffeness of Everything!

2008-12-12T09:28:00.001-08:00

I'm not getting different glasses!

After a week of my daughter Nexi neckling at me to get some 'cool' frames, and arguing about which of the photos she'd taken of me was best, I was feeling a little nexasperated.

I turned to Maureen.

"What should I do?" I sighed.

"Nothing!" replied Maureen. "You are who you are. All the years I've known you, you've looked like Raph G. Neckmann. Don't change!"

Oh, the joy of being true to one's self and the glorious giraffeness of everything!

Yesterday one of my pans of chutney boiled over. (I admit, I was distracted by blogging, and when I was about to clear up the mess, I got dragged away to practise our song for tomorrow). What a wonderful surprise I had today, to discover the spillage on the AFF Gas cooker had set into the most beautiful giraffe-pattern!

I feel at one with the universe!

The Best Food Grows On Trees!

2008-12-11T13:49:00.000-08:00

Ambling around the blogosphere earlier today I came across a delicious-sounding recipe at Willow Manor. (I hope I've managed to put a link to it - we're quite new to the Interneck here in Neckelchester, and I've only just worked out how to enable Comments!) The recipe is called Blackstreet's Cabbage Roll Casserole, and I've asked Girth to try it out at the Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant, (without the meat in it of course, as we giraffes are vegetarian).

I've posted the picture of a willow tree to say 'thank you' to Willow for such a beautiful, varied and interesting blog.

The image shows one of the wild giraffes of Giraffe World. They like to browse among the trees by the streams, and also up on the knolls and mountains.

Below is a reproduction from an ancient tapestry in Raffsburgh Castle. It depicts two of our elegant ancestors eating scones and jam in a lovely summer garden surrounded by fruit trees.

Although we're now nearing mid-winter I've been warm and cosy in our kitchen engaged in one of my favourite seasonal activities - making chutney! I'm certainly no cook, as my family will verify, but my chutneys and jams are renowned throughout Knollshire!

One way of judging a good Giraffe World chutney is to look at the shapes made by the evaporate under the lid. You should be able to see very definite giraffe-pattern markings - can you spot them in the photograph?

Giraffe Glasses

2008-12-09T13:17:00.000-08:00

My daughter Nexi told me that I need to change my glasses. She says my half-moon spectacles make me look more like her grandfather than her dad. (Apparently she formed this opinion during the Nex Factor singing competition at the weekend). I am commanded to get some more up-to-date glasses to wear when we perform our family song at next Saturday's final!

I decided to discreetly visit a few opticians in Raffsburgh to try on some frames. On my own ...

No chance! The family guessed my quest and insisted on coming along, 'to advise'. Nexi brought a camera and photographed me in a variety of frames. 'So we can all make a sensible decision at home!' said she.

Here I am in bespectacled splendour!

'The Executive'

'The Artist'

'The Singer-songwriter'

'The Astronomer'

Which will it be?

The Nex Factor comes to Neckelchester Village

2008-12-07T15:10:00.001-08:00

We had a really exciting evening yesterday!

A couple of weeks ago Necky Becky had picked up a leaflet advertising a singing competition to be held in the village. The competition is called 'The Nex Factor', and lots of our friends are entering. Of course, we all wanted to join in!

After much debate, we put together several entries, and spent vast amounts of time rehearsing. I had a great number called 'Raph's Rap', which seemed to cause embarrassment and cringing among the family whenever I 'sang' it. My sister entered 'They call me Nektareeni', which she often performs in her restaurant. Necky Becky insisted on screeching 'Be Who You Wanna Be!', to the horror of her sister. Our final entry was our family song, 'With Our Necks Entwined'. We had written this to celebrate moving to Necky Knoll House and launching our new business.

The Village Hall was packed last night for the first round. All the giraffes of Neckelchester and Raffsburgh must have wanted to stick their necks out and sing! After a long evening of music, merriment and intense competition, the judges made their decisions as to which contestants will be going through to next week's final ...

Three of our acts are going through! (Unfortunately my rap number was not chosen). Twenty songs will be performed again next week at The Gleeful & Greedy Restaurant. Of these, one will be selected to win:

Knitting Neckwarmers in a Neckonomic Downturn

2008-12-03T16:25:00.001-08:00

We giraffes feel the cold. The more neck you have, the longer the scarf you need! I'd been grumbling about the dearth of winter neck-attire in the village shops, when our enterprising elder daughter Nexi came up with the idea of knitting our own - and selling the surplus ...

I'm a great believer that when there is a downturn in the neckonomy a bit of flexibility keeps your head above water. With this in mind, and without thinking too much, I said "Great idea!" to Nexi.

Several hours later, my enthusiasm and our bank balance had diminished and my neck was aching from heaving dozens of boxes of knitting wool up the front steps. Necky Becky had voiced her shrill disapproval all the way round the village, but her sister had her own way. Soon the whole family, (and several friends), were resolutely knitting.

Maureen started me off on a simple chunky scarf, while she worked on a very distinguished-looking pinstriped creation to go with my business suit. Nexi was showing off with some circular needles, designing a whole range of stylish neckwarmers. She even managed to persuade Nukkle to stop knitting with his drumsticks!

When we had picked out the neck-wear we wanted to keep for our own use, (and the ones with too many dropped stitches - ie mine), we took the rest to be sold in Nektareeni's Fashions.

Nexi's neckwarmers have been a big hit! Maureen tells me we're in profit already and we've got a long list of orders. She also gently informed me that most of the scarves I knitted have been returned.

Rambling Again!

2008-12-02T14:38:00.001-08:00

Over half a year has passed since I last wrote my Ramblings, and what a nextraordinary year it has been! I can hardly even begin to describe everything that has taken place. Suffice to say we have settled in uproariously at Necky Knoll House, had a fun-filled start to our Giraffe World Tours business and to top it all, experienced a most fantastic and unexpected adventure!

My sister Nektareeni suggested that Maureen should write a book about it all. I'll just keep on rambling about our neccentrically normal everyday lives ...

Supernecks Heroes!

2008-05-02T10:16:00.000-07:00

Tonight we're having our grand house-warming party, and it's to be Fancy Dress! Maureen and I are going as Supernecks Heroes. Our eldest daughter Nexi designed and made our outfits, and we've just been having a dress rehearsal. I have to say they do look rather splendid!

(I tried wearing the costume without my glasses, as I think they spoil the effect a little. The trouble is, looking down from the top of my neck, people's feet look so far away I keep stepping on them. I opted for the opticals!)

These outfits are so magnificent, it seems a shame to only wear them for the party. I suggested that Maureen and I put them on when we are driving the Tours bus - it could be our USP. I thought it would be especially effective if we did follow my idea of buying a second bus for Astronomy Tours - it would give the impression that we were from another galaxy ...

Nexi said I always give the impression of being from another galaxy, or more like from a comic book, with the emphasis on the word 'comic'.

Maureen smiled serenely and said we all ought to be in a giraphic novel, and for the time being could we use our super-powers to rearrange the furniture in preparation for tonight's party.

A Neckshund in the Attic!

2008-04-28T16:58:00.001-07:00

We've all been neckling in in our own ways since moving. For our middle child, Necky Becky, this has involved a small feat of engineering. She chose the attic for her room, (top of the house, secret, no-one else allowed), which presented the challenge of how to get her pet neckshund dog, Hals, up there!

I'd been brushing my teeth in the front bathroom, when I heard most peculiar creaking noises coming from the landing. On investigating I nearly collided with Hals who was dangling in mid air in front of me. He was suspended in a little sort of hammock made from a cushion and what looked like a piece of net curtain, and obviously thought this was a great new game.

Necky Becky glared at me from the loft ladder, then hauled Hals up to her attic using a wheel and lever she had attached to the joists next to the trap-door.

She's certainly got plenty of neck when it comes to overcoming obstacles to getting her own way!

Our Dream Has Come True!

2008-04-22T14:23:00.000-07:00

What a nexceptionally busy week this has been! I thought the prior preparation and packing was the hectic part of moving, but ever since actually moving in there's been even more to do. It's all been hard work, but great fun, and we're all in gleeful giraffitude spirits because our dream has come true!

I will always remember the journey to our new home. We set off a little later than we'd intended and had to drive quite slowly because of all the ruts and hollows in the little-used Forest Road. At one point Gaffer's van bumped over such a deep set of holes that the back shutter came open and a load of boxes fell out! We had to stop the bus and help to put them all back in again. There was no damage, and it gave us an opportunity to take in the beauty of our surroundings.

By this time the sun was beginning to set in a vivid pink sky dappled with little slow-moving magenta clouds. Above us the slender moon shone. Everything seemed to shimmer with light and pattern, from the new spring foliage to the markings on the tree trunks. There was a mysterious sense of waiting, as if something fantastic was about to happen. After standing still for a while in perfect silence, we climbed back into our vehicles.

I kept glancing across at Maureen as we neared Necky Knoll House. She looked so serenely beautiful gazing out of the window. At the top of one of the knolls a group of wild giraffes stood in the moonlight. Maureen turned her head towards me and smiled, and my heart was full of excitement in anticipation of our future.

I'm being called! We're just about to go out on our first visit to Neckelchester village since the move. It was raining for several days, and today is nice and sunny, so we're having an afternoon off!

Giraffe House Moving Day!

2008-04-14T13:59:00.001-07:00

After an incredibly busy weekend running around with 'Moving House' lists and packing boxes, we're just about ready to move.

There was so much to pack. I know some folk like to use a professional packing service, but we really wanted to sort out our own things and enjoy the occasion! It was fun and also quite sentimental going through baby things, and finding old photos and bits and pieces from the family. Nexi found some of her early school artwork and boasted about it so much that Neck Becky stormed off in disgust. There were a few other minor sibling squabbles, but on the whole it was a very harmonious time.

We're putting the fragile and awkwardly shaped items, (of which there are always many in a giraffe house!), on the bus so we can hang on to them on the journey. Our friend Gaffer Giraffter from 'Our Neck of the Woods Timber & Furniture' brought his big old van across this morning. He and two other friends, Rich and Nukkle, have been loading it up for several hours and now it's neck full and ready to go.

We've just been having a last walk round the cottage and the garden. Maureen's been quickly dividing snowdrops so we have some to plant in our new garden.

Must get going - I can hear Gaffer revving the van. There's Rich shouting "Necks ahead!" Time to start up the bus! We're supposed to be leading the way - we've decided to go the scenic route across the Neckmoors and along the Forest Road.

To Necky Knoll House!

"Would you like your bus wrapping, Sir?"

2008-04-11T18:58:00.000-07:00

This afternoon we went to collect our new bus. We'd found the type we wanted on Monday at a garage in Raffsburgh. I'd envisaged driving it home then and there, so I was a little perplexed when the sales chap asked if I wanted it wrapping.

"Pardon?" I asked.

I had a mental image of a huge roll of wrapping paper about 10 metres wide, and wondered if they'd leave a gap so I could see out of the windscreen.

Maureen explained gently that the garage had a vehicle branding service, and that a vehicle wrap could be either full or partial and referred to graphics.

I was still trying to get my neck round this idea, when our eldest daughter Nexi shrieked, "Graphics! Of course - I'll design it! I can do it at college, based on the logo I've created for the business. It'll look fab running in a strip along the side of the bus."

By now I'd seen the light and said I rather fancied the full bus wrap. We could have the logo, 'Giraffe World Tours', surrounded by stars and planets swirling all over the bus. (Guess who has been looking through his wonderful new telescope!)

Nexi threw up her hands in horror and explained witheringly that the whole point of vehicle signage was so that people would notice the name of the business as we drove by, and that we ought to look like a tours company, not a mobile astronomical observatory.

I was rather taken with the observatory idea, and suggested that we get a second bus specializing in astronomy tours.

Nexi turned her back on me and told the by-now-thoroughly-confused salesman that she'd send a file with the artwork and could the bus be ready to collect on Friday please?

So there we were this afternoon, and I have to say that Nexi's design looked superb.

Both Maureen and I got our PGV (Passenger Giraffe Vehicle) licences a few weeks ago, so we tossed a coin to see who would drive the bus home. I called 'Necks Up', and it was, so I did!

Spring Snow Heralds a Speedy Completion!

2008-04-10T17:31:00.001-07:00

What a wonderful week this has been!

We had a lovely little launch party on Sunday evening to celebrate the start date of our new business, Giraffe World Tours. It was held at my sister's restaurant in Neckelchester, and we couldn't resist a quick peek at Necky Knoll House before the party began. It had been snowing that day, and we stood outside our future home in the pale evening light. The pearly colours of the snow-clad landscape blended with the emerging spring foliage, and the house looked almost radiant.

We all felt it was symbolic of a beautiful beginning.

On Monday morning we were just about to go out and look for a nice bus for our Tours business, when the phone rang. It was the estate agent. He told us that as everything was going through smoothly with the purchase of Necky Knoll House, we could expect to complete on the 14th!

Only a week away ... (less than four days now)!

Farewell to Accounting - Enter Giraffe Entrepreneur!

2008-04-06T15:44:00.001-07:00

Friday was my last day as an accountant! It has been a whole month since I stuck my neck out and handed in my notice at Storey & Tawle.

During the afternoon, I had a real surprise. All the staff came crowding into my office, carrying a large cake and a mysterious package. For me! They lit all the candles on the cake, (seventeen for the years I worked there), hung some garlands round my neck, and told me to open my present. There was a card with the caption 'Stick Your Neck Out For The Stars!', which everyone had signed wishing me success in the new business. With it came a paper hat with 'Star' on the front. When I opened the package, I was amazed to find a large telescope!

I confess I had a few tears running down my cheeks as I stuttered my thanks. Of course, I had to give a little speech. I told everyone they would be invited to come on a free day trip once we have established our new family business, Giraffe World Tours, and that after using my lovely new telescope, we would no doubt be organizing trips into space!

Leaving accountancy amid cheers and fond farewells was a warming experience. My neck feels strengthened, and I'm ready to embrace entrepreneurship with full 'Giraffitude'!

This evening the family and our friends are holding a little celebratory launch of our new business.

Tenants with Twins!

2008-04-01T17:45:00.001-07:00

We have tenants for Neckmoor Cottage! Over the weekend we had a visit from an exceptionally pleasant couple who are Neckmoors Rangers. They look after the moorland environment and the wild giraffes, as well as leading guided walks and organizing conservation events. What an ideal location for them!

They brought their young twins with them, and Littl' Nicky was entranced. It was the first time he had seen a double pram with two baby giraffes in, and he spent all afternoon making 'goo' noises with them.

It is marvellous to have tenants who will have a real affinity with the place. The Grangers were delighted with everything, including the vegetable garden! They will take over all the growing. Maureen and I have supplied vegetables to my sister's restaurant in Neckelchester, assisted by our old gardener, Gnarly. Gnarly was here when the Grangers called, and they all got on famously, putting their necks together about different varieties of marrows and courgettes, and prevailing winds ...

As soon as we have completed the purchase of Necky Knoll House, we'll move out and the Grangers will move in. It is very exciting - yet both Maureen and I feel a little wistful.

I stood outside the cottage later that night. A group of wild giraffes had gathered on the opposite hillside and were silhouetted against the windswept sky. As they cantered gracefully into the distance, I knew how pleased Maureen must be to know they will be cared for.

Moonlit Giraffodils

2008-03-28T14:41:00.001-07:00

I've been in a giraffodil mood for days! I should really say 'moods' in the plural, for giraffodils can induce a whole range of emotions, from merry and light-hearted, to tranquil, through to mysteriously inspiring and numinous.

There's a picture hanging in our diningroom entitled 'Moonlit Giraffodils'. For me it essentially captures that transcendent moment when you are suddenly face-to-face with swathes of pale giraffodils all nodding in the ethereal light.

The moon is currently full, so yesterday evening I ventured out into the woods just beyond the farm. The scene was remarkably similar to our picture! I felt so moved that I was unable to stay long, but returned home and penned this poem. A little clumsy, but it expresses how I felt.

Moonlit Giraffodils

At the edge of the wood the giraffodils wait in swathes,

And the sunlight bids the twilight in, which bathes

Those nodding blooms in rose, and dwindling rays

******Of gold, to usher in the night.

A bird in the branches trills and trills again its song so high

In the bud-laden twigs, whose tips shall rake the sky,

Now clouded. Gently the breeze whispers, rustles turf, trees sigh.

******The moon, unveiled, reveals her secret light.

Now silver trumpets lift on slender necks of gold, and sing

To the moonlight shining forth - their homage bring

In graceful rhythm, fragrant dance of spring,

******Pulsating pattern of scent and sound and sight.

And I, like an interloper, watch from birch bole hide,

Trembling lest so transfixed and rooted, I abide

Forever in this sylvan glade! O quickly turn aside,

******And run for home and snug and slumber tight.

Raph G. Neckmann 28th March 2008 14:41GWT

Leaving Accounting, but still thinking about Money?!

2008-03-24T14:33:00.001-07:00

Now I'm leaving accountancy, why do I still have to think about money? Because I'm becoming an entrepreneur? Because we're buying a new house and running a business? Oh dear ...

Fortunately I don't have to think about the finances too much. Maureen is much better at that sort of thing and actually enjoys it! I'm glad. I have so many interesting ideas for the business - thinking about making money is a distraction. I suppose it's a necessary evil, like having to brush one's teeth ...

We talked to a financial advisor from Flexineck Finance the other day - nice chap called Frank. He suggested that while we're building up the Tours business we rent out Neckmoor Cottage to long-term tenants rather than wait for holiday-makers, so we will have a steady source of income. Very sensible.

We own the cottage outright and are putting quite a large deposit down for Necky Knoll House, while keeping some capital for the business. Frank is sorting out a small mortgage for the house, which Maureen says is on good terms. So if the survey, and whatever else, is satisfactory, we should be able to complete around mid-April and move in!

Nexi suggested that if we're short of money we can do virtual tours of Necky Knoll House on the Interneck, showing her 'fab' interior designs transforming the place. Necky Becky said the site should be called 'Nexi-wrecksa-room'.

I put the tea-cosy on my head so I could read the paper in peace without being deafened by their bickering. It will be wonderful to have a house with lots of quiet rooms!